ace attorneys in the woods
by barrylawn
Summary: japanifornia is falling. gaspen pain and gumshoe are kings. phoenix was arrested. trucy was kidnapped by the moon. athena was killed by edgeworth. and blackquill is training for the samurai competition. apollo decides eough is enough and must find a happy life in the woods. CAN HE DO IT? OR WILL HE BE SLAIN BY THE TWISTED SAMURAI?
1. true love

BARRYLAWN PRESENTS

ACE ATTORNEYS IN THE WOODS: THE FIC THERES NO MOVIE THEY SHOULD PROBABLY MAKE ONE

BY BARRYLAN

chapter 1 true love

gaspen payne got home after a long day of being yelled at bye pheonix wright and losing his case for getting two many penalties. he went into his bed and landed on detective ema skye

lol jk it was actually gummy.

"hey pal" said gummy and payne gasped in pain and asked

"what are you doing here" and gumshoe said

"im looking for a home" and payne said

"oh." they slept together all night and gaspen woke up in a hug with gummy who was still unconscious from the alcohol gaspen kept downstairs. he smelt very funny. gaspen winced in payne and slapped him until he died. there was a knock on the door and maya walked in maya said

"im here to channel gummys spirit" and she got on the bed and channeled gummy and gummy said

"yay im alive hi gaspy i missed you pal." he looked exactly like the man lying in bed because hes sleepy. gummy then huggen gaspy and he said

"i love you" and payne said

"i dont" and gummy said

"why not" and payne was tired so he said

"i love you" and they didnt hug again because they were still hugging. there was a knock on the door and shelly de killer came in and he said

"I have a duty to protect my clients" because hes important and deserves proper grammar. gummy screamed like a 20 year old spirit medium and payne gasped in pain but de killer just walked in and took gaspens glasses and put them on

"I need to be able to see, you see" he said and left the room. aw gaspy you can have my glasses said gummy giving gaspen his glasses and gaspen said thank you and put them on. they then lived together as a happy couple who did nothing but laugh at rookie defense lawyers like pheonix wrong and apollo jester and athena psycho and drinking at the bar every night one night they even broke into the wright nothing agency and laughed at trucy for having crap company.

shelly de killer then came in with his fancy glasses and murdered pheonix because apollo wanted to have another game of his own.

"what game" asked trucy but de killer didn't answer because hes badass.

"court is now in session for the trial of apollo jester" said judge and everyone laughed except athena psycho because shes a defense lawyer and they're boring. "gaspen payne give us your opening statement" said judge and gumshoe said

"good luck pal" and payne said

"okay. the defendant hired shelly de killer to murder mr pheonix wrong because he kept stealing the spotlight from him."

"de killer you say?" said judge. "i remember him, he was the one who murdered adrian andrews back then and juan corrida was accused and maya fey accused matt engarde of the murder" he said and payne said

"i believe so" and gummy said

"yeah pal." payne said

"we also have evidence, this is a quote from this fanfiction shelly de killer then came in with his fancy glasses and murdered pheonix because apollo wanted to have another game of his own." legit quote added to the court record "but i have an organizer" said payne but gumshoe said

"it's okay pal i will never leave you out of anything" and payne said

"thank you." judge said

"well i suppose there's no reason to prolong this trial i find the defen" but athena said

"objection and said i have a duty to protect my clients" and judge said

"you're right" and payne and gumshoe groaned.

"fine" said payne "the prosecution calls wendy oldbag to the stand."

"ooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhh edg- wait WHERE'S EDGEYPOO" shouted oldbag and payne sweated and oldbag said "well when i was your age i always used to say oooh i want to be a witness and i would go in and edgeypoo would be there next to me fighting that NASTY BLUE SUITED DEVIL MAN with his strong words and his echoey OBJECTION! and he never said a bad thing to me except that one time when i was a big hit on tv but that was okay because he was in shock from having the grace of seeing his wendypoo again after so many hours and then he"

"can we please get on with the testimony" moaned payne

"agreed witness give us your testimony"

"okay judge."

WITNESS TESTIMONY

what i saw

"well sonny, last night i was looking for edgeypoo and decided to look in his agency so i went in and saw the gummy detective who likes edgeworth and"

"HOLD IT!" said someone and gumshoe said "hey pal, i like prosecutor payne okay pal" and oldbag said

"oops" but that didnt matter because the judge penalized payne for it. oldbag continued

"i then saw mr doe walk into the agency and murder pheonix wrong. trucy was crying because of this."

"OBJECTION!" athena pointed and shouted "ms old granny trucy was crying because gummy and payne were laughing at her" and then granny screamed in pain and payne raised an objection and said

"only im allowed to scream in pain" but the judge gave him a massive penalty.

"ms granny, you hired shelly de killer" said athena and granny shrieked but not in pain.

"good" said payne and the judge was deaf so he didnt get penalized. granny cried and cried and cried and fell onto the floor dead.

"this court finds the defendant apollo jester LAUGH LAUGH LAUGH not guilty."

payne stormed home and cried and cried and cried and cried now that i said it four times he cried more than old granny. gumshoe kissed him on the forehead but saw he was dead.

BUT HE WOKE UP!

"I AM IMMUNE TO DEATH" shouted payne.

"gaspy your okay" said gummy and payne said

"gummy we shall not stand for this bullying" and gummy said

"what do you mean pal." payne took gummys hand and they teleported right into leifa killing her.

"who was that pal" said gummy but payne shrugged and waved his hand and leifa came back to life like payne.

"welcome to kingdom of kurain" said leifa "you are our king gaspen payne" and payne gasped in pain because thats how he has to gasp (thanks capcom). payne became the king even though he already was and won every case because defense attorneys were silly in kurain and nobody could take the bar exam he was so happy but then he heard

"igiari" and asked

"what does that mean" and then he saw pheonix wrong at the defense bench

"wrong i thought you were dead" said payne and wrong laughed.

"i am immune to death mr payne." but payne laughed back and got the defendant guilty and then confetti fell from the ceiling and payne looked up and saw gummy throwing it down happily. pheonix became the laughing stock of the country and nobody had any igiaris to payne taking him as his slave.

"i still dont know what that means pal" said gaspen.

MEANWHILE IN JAPANIFORNIA (thats what people call phoenixs home for some reason)

apollo jester was in tears. athena was murdered by shi long lang and trucy was kidnapped by the moon and pheonix left him responsible. apollo thought and thought and got an idea and he ran into the woods where nobody would ever find him but taka grabbed him and flew him to basequill, the base of simon blackquill the twisted samurai who was busy fucking dee vasquez.

"what do you want justicedono" yelled blackquill throwing an empty bottle at him it hit him in the head and apollo said

"ouch. why did your feathery... BIRD abduct me from the forest ow" said apollo as taka pecked him in the eye.

blackquill laughed "oh justicedono taka is a gentleman" he said

"a gentleman you say" said professor layton.

"yes" said blackquill "hes very nice."

"does he like puzzles" asked luke and blackquill said

"yes hes very smart" so professor gave taka a puzzle named the knights tour 4 which taka solved in 3.4 seconds.

"he didnt even use a hint coin unlike us" said layton.

"hmph" said blackquill "the ransom is paid you may now go justicedono" and justice yelled in victory with his chords of steel.

TO BE CONTINUE

AN hey guys what do you think of my NEW SERIES? tell me in the reviews and ill make more tomorrow!


	2. justicedono for all

Chapter 2

justicedono for all

justicedono after escaping the evil clutches of blackquilldono, vasqezdono, takadono and professor laytondono and the miserable grasp of lukedono ran into the woods and banged his head into a tree.

"WHY" bang "IS" bang "MY" bang "LIFE" bang "SO" bang "MISERABLE?!" ...BANG. the tree gave way and fell down and then he noticed there was a house up there and saw someone in there and justicedono said

"hold it" and touched his bracelet to slow down time and went up to the tree house and took woodsdono out of the tree house and onto fat land. woodsdono cried and said

"polly" and justicedono said

"junie dont do dangerous things like that" and then they noticed the screams of the other woodsdonos as the tree fell down killing all of them. justicedono fled the scene with woodsdono because being on trial sucks.

meanwhile in the republic of zheng fa courtneydono said hello to debestedono.

meanwhile in basequill laytondono and tritondono were trying to solve wheres my village but they had 2 picarats left. blackquilldono abandoned vasquezdono and continued his samurai training so he could beat samuraidono in the twisted samurai marathon. he used takadono as his target and slashed his katana at him with glee.

"you will not leave this contest alive samuraidono" he yelled.

back in kingdom of kurain wrongdono was hating life even though he was undead which i guess makes him alive though. paynedono and gumshoedono were treated like kings because they were as they continued their reign of terror across the kingdom with their army of wrongdono.

HOWEVER!

what they didnt no was the plan of TREASON being made agenst them! for you see young bokuto sunamidono the best frend of phoenix wrigtedono was planing a brekout for the ace atorney.

"ill save you phoenix wright!" shouted bokutodono

"who was that pal" sad gumshoedono

"never mind lets go back to ruling kurain" said paynedono

speaking of kurain pearl feydono was wondering where mystic mayadono had gone and worried if mr nickdono had sent an assassin after her. feydono then packed her bags, and went on her hunt.

"ill find you mystic maya for mr nick" said pearls.

"huff huff huff" said justicedono as he closed the door of the abandoned shed. he looked out the window for police but decided he was fine.

"im fine" he said. de killerdono then knocked on the door.

"want soome icecream" he said then hit justicedono on the nose "thats for betraying me he said and ran away. justicedono ran after him enraged and woodsdono turned around

"where did polly go" she wondered and left the shed.

march 21 1:30pm zheng fa

"overruled" yelled courtneydono because debestedono said something stupid. "sebastian ask the nice old woman questions relevant to the pickpocket case and stop asking for a date" said courtneydono

"but courtney" moaned debestedono but courtneydono hit him with her gavel to shut him up.

"now listen up son" said womandono because this is relevant to the story. "the boys *static* was stolen by *static*."

"hmmmmmmm" said debestedono and then the camera zoomed into him.

victim was a little boy and someone pickpocketed him were his options. he put them together.

"eureka" he said. "the victim was a child and he was pickpocketed. so... he must be an idiot" shouted debestedono.

"brilliant work sherlock debeste" said courtneydono "now lets bring justice to the criminal for this idiot and the goddess of the law!"

they were characters from investigations 2 if ya didnt know.

TO BE CONTINUED

an hey guys wasnt that a funny chapter i wont keep doing the dono thing thogh i know its hilarious but it might get old yno but anyway favorite follow and review 4 more!


	3. dick gumshoe escaps from kurain

CHapter 3 DICK GUMSHOE ESCAPS FROM KURAAAAAAAIN

gummy was tired. he loved gaspen but he missed mr edgeworth and he missed kay. he didn't miss pheonix wrong because he was screamen payne down stairs.

"but where is mr edgeworth" he pondered. he looked at payne. he loved him, he really did. but its times in love when the couple just must split. he wrote a note and left it on the table.

'deer gaspy eye am leafing dis villij to find my frends and live happy ever after. i will miss you my luv. your pal gumshoo. 3' with that gummy left the room but the moment he closed the door the alarm wailed.

"king is trying to go out for a walk alone surround the castle and apprehend him to get him a guard this is not a drill dundun dun duun duuuuun dundundun dun dun duuuundundundundunduuuuuuuuun" it played loud escape music

"shit there onto me!" shouted bokuto who was in the shadows

"aaaaaaagh" yelled gummy as he ran straight into the guards crushing them. he grabbed the thinker and hit many over the head for a 39 combo.

"i wanted a 40 pal" he whined but still ran so he didnt get arrested like a dumb detective. he got into a rowing boat and rowed away but the guards had a speedboat. gummy paddled faster until he lost them.

"to japanifornia" he yelled "oh crap i gave away my position to them maybe." he passed zheng fa and stupid prosecutor swam to him.

"give us a ride dumbass" shouted debeste at gummy as courtney graciously entered the boat.

"gee pal no need to be rude" he said and started rowing again.

"heh heh" laughed the mysterious culprit under them "it seems escaping with the boys shit was cake." he cackled but gummy thought it was courtney and courtney thought it was sebastian and sebastian also thought it was courtney so they paid no attention to it.

"being on the moon sucks thought trucy holy shit i forgot she was up there thats funny.

blackquill cut taka in half.

"oops" he muttered and taped him back together and taka said

"thank you" and blackquill was startled.

"you can speak" he shouted

"yes thanks to the power of your magic tape" said taka. "also now i know where the secret is" said taka and flew out the window and blackquill followed him into the woods. he found an unconscious de killer and apollo pretending to be asleep. he arrested apollo and juniper who was nearby, unaware of the true presence of the secret.

meanwhile back in kurain

bokuto got out from under the shadows

"its safe finally" said boktuo "now to find phoenix write"

"bokk is that you" said the floor

"phoenix" sid bokuto

"yes com on i need yur assistant"

bokuto ran to were the floor was talking to him

"gummy this is so boring" said debeste and gummy said

"right tanks for the feedback" and used this criticism to make the ride faster and they were immediately on the shore of japanifornia.

"we are here" he yelled "now to find mr edgeworth"

"gumshoe wait" said debeste but he already vanished.

"so were here at last" said the mysterious culprit "good"

TO BE CONTINUED

AN woah man now isnt that a cliffhanger who is this mysterious culprit FIND OUT NEXT CHAPTER and do the faving stuff if u favor this fic


	4. puzzle master

CHApter 4 puzzle master

dee was a bitch. she knew that since she was five, when she asked the sexy boy named sal in her class for a date but he said

"ewwww bitch j00 mad br0" and since then she knew she was a bitch. she never went on a date except with dahlia hawthorne since then aside from sal but she remembered what he did halfway through that date and dumped him. she walked around beating the crap out of everyone for pleasure. she even blackmailed a hammer. that was the true nature of vazquez.

she walked the woods path wondering who her next victim should be and saw blackquill carrying the justicedono person from earlier and a dense looking forest girl out of the woods. an ominous man with ice cream watched him leave then vanished. it reminded her of the time when she was seventeen and she kicked a guy named shelly in the ass and he threw an ice cream in her face and said ha. this was a bad memory so she sat in the mud and cried.

"oh the horror. the horror!" she took at a plastic tray, filled it with mud and threw it.

meanwhile de killer was fucking around in the forest like a fuck when a mud pie hit him in the face.

"thats it im going to become a better person" she said. "i will fight crime from now on." dee walked away proud of her decision.

"i am not responsible for any typos in this chapter fyi" said author.

apollo woke up in basequill and saw professor layton.

"again" he yelled "why dont you kidnap someone else you assadist." layton politely shook his head

"i did not do anything of the sort." blackquill walked in

"i did justicedono. laytondono is just a minion. and junipers here too."

"well you still brought me here too you thick birdman." blackquill coughed

"birdman?" he yelled "thats it justicedono im using you for practice" he shouted apollo shouted

"nooooooooooooooo."

PUZZLE NO. 3

This puzzle is worth 50 picarats

apollo was tortured and sliced and beaten by blackquill and he laughed. those are the facts, now, how many times did i say blackquill?

10

luke said

"hmmm how about this" but then he facepalmed and said "ive let you down professor" but then layton said

"ive already seen the answer" and he pointed. "you should expect no less from a gentleman" said layton and luke cried because that meant he wasnt a gentleman and stormed off but layton didnt care. "thats what one gets for robbing me off ten picarats."

luke jumped into the river because he couldn't be a gentleman and then suddenly an old man surfaced from underwater.

"oho. flukey. swim much?" said gant clapping.

"sorry but only gentleman talk to old grandads" said luke and he swam away as fast as he could. he then hit his head on a boat and heard a faint shout in shock but ignored it because he found dry land. he stepped onto the land and praised his god for sparing him because he is a good religionboy who thanks his god for everything.

"luke try this puzzle." said a voice in the sky who was his god

PUZZLE NO. 4

Who to worship?

This puzzle is worth a thousand words, which are worth 70 picarats.

Who should you worship? God, Money, Apollo or Wario?

*Wario*

"well heres my guess" he said and then he pointed like the professor "i did it!" he yelled.

"waaaahaahaahaa!" said the voice from earlier who was wario the lord our god. "you have good beliefs you believe in the truth! i have no protestos to that! waahahaha!" he handed luke a sack of gold. "use it wisely. wahahahahahahahahahahahaha" wario laughed after he vanished. but luke wasnt happy about the gold, but the 70 picarats he got.

"i solved a puzzle all on my own" said luke. "i really am a true gentleman."

"and now its time for my grand entrance" said the mysterious culprit who was under the boat

TO BE CONTINUED FAV FOLLOW REVIEW IF U LIKED GTFO IF U DISLIKED


	5. logic chess

CHAPter 5 logic chess

"look mr edgeworth" said kay "there is gummy." she pointed to the confused looking scruffy man in a trench coat with the backs turned to them.

"stay away from that idiotic housewife kay." said edgeworth.

"but mr edgeworth thats just a fanfic" said kay

"yes kay and this is also a fanfic" said edgeworth and kay said

"how do you know that" and he said

"logic."

"look pal" said gummy "i really dont wanna go to extremes here. have you seen mr edgeworth."

yanni yogi drunkenly shaked his head.

"sorry keith i know nothing about that newfangled stuff."

"alright fine" said gumshoe and he tapped his forehead twice like edgeworth always did and saw the image of a chessboard surround him.

begin logic chess.

"hey pal" said gumshoe "where is mr edgeworth. tell me now."

"hmm well keith i dont wanna tell you" said yogi.

"he wont tell me. this could be a valuable clue. now pal where is kay."

"dont know."

"lets try using that clue" said gumshoe.

"you dont want to tell me mr yogi" he said and a million white chess pieces surrounded him. "where are they" he yelled and they bombarded him killing his pawn queen rook and king. "check... wait what was the rest again." suddenly one of gumshoes pawns hit yogi in the face killing him but in his last few breaths he got out

"they were behind you dumbass." he was then dead forever.

"dammit dammit dammit" yelled gumshoe because they were gone.

"excuse me sir" said someone behind him.

"mr edgeworth" gumshoe said but instead saw frank sahwit smiling at him.

"can interest you to my wares i have... well... this cheap looking penny nichols keychain."

"how much is it" asked gumshoe and sahwit said

"$0.01"

"i cant afford that"

"okay its free shit i wanted to profit" said frank and gumshoe took it.

"yay i bought something for the first time ever" he cheered. he put it on his keychain to go with his collection of blue badger keychains. he was so so happy. he decided to set up a camp in the middle of the woods. he didnt find mr edgeworth or kay but he hit a milestone so he was happy.

"im so happy he kept saying until he fell asleep."

TO BE CONTINUED KEPE READING IF YOU LIKE THIS EXCITING ADVENTURE


	6. shits heating up

CHAPTer 6 shits heating up

pearl walked into the forest. perhaps mystic maya was here? she thought.

"mystic maya?" she yelled.

"Yes, can I help you?" said someone. she turned and saw a suspicious looking man with ice cream but he had mud on his face so she didnt recognize the great man that was shelly de killer.

"who are you" said pearls

"My name is John Doe. I am looking for a friend of mine. You may know him as Simon Blackquill?" sorry i dont think i know him said pearls.

"Oh, that's alright." he said and walked deeper into the woods.

"huh weird" thought pearls.

"oh wait, mr doe" she yelled. "have you seen anyone wearing clothes like mine she yelled."

"No, but I have seen a rather large man who looks like he was wearing them at some point, young lady. Perhaps that is who you're looking for?"

"um no but thank you" said pearls. mr doe walked away. a large man who wore mystic mayas clothes she thought. maybe she was eaten by the woods creatures. pearls was scared but she didnt know where the exit to the forest is and she had to find mystic maya. she walked around until she found a young gentleman in blue walking proudly across the woods.

"hey" she yelled. the boy turned and saw pearls running to him.

"have you seen a woman with... what is that" she asked noticing the sack.

"oh uh nothing" the boy said blushing because pearls was cute. there was gold in there but pearls didnt question it.

"wheres mystic maya" she asked the boy. he shrugged.

"i dont know. i just like solving puzzles like this one."

PUZZLE NO. 4

Who to worship?

Picarats have been taken

Who should you worship? God, Money, Apollo or Wario?

"apollos my friend so i guess apollo."

*Apollo*

"FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!" yelled wario and lightning struck the land. he grabbed pearls and tossed her into the sky and she landed deep into the forest and didnt know where to go. she could faintly hear a voice nearby.

"im so happy" it said. she ran in its direction and saw a scruffy man passed out in the dirt. he was sinking. pearls pulled him out.

"mr gumshoe you shouldnt sleep in places like these" said pearls.

"i know pal im sorry pal" said gumshoe.

"wait mr gumshoe you look familiar" said pearls. "are you being channeled by mystic maya" she asked.

"i guess i am. mr payne said richard wellingon killed me in my sleep. i dunno. guess you want maya back huh. oh well." suddenly gumshoes body changed shape and maya fell on the ground.

"mystic maya" pearls shouted happily. maya woke up.

"pearly" she said. they hugged and then

"FREEZE" and sebastian debeste had his henchmen surround pearl and maya. "search them" he yelled and they searched maya and pearls until someone shouted

"found it." he pulled out a set of keychains from mayas trenchcoat one of them being of penny nichols.

"your under arrest ms fey" said sebastian and pearls said

"what did i do" and sebastian said

"not you ms fey the other ms fey" and pearls said

"leave mystic maya alone you jerk" and sebastian cried

"courtney pearl is being mean" so courtney hit pearl on the head with her gavel and the impact was so strong the gavel got sent into space.

"oh well the goddess of the law will accept that as a sacrifice" said courtney and they arrested maya fey.

"myyyyyyyyysssssstiiiiiiiccc maaaaaaaayyyyyyaaaaaaaaa" pearls cired.

the phone rang.

"gaspen speaking. oh. im needed. hee hee hee... with pleasure." he put down the phone. "well wrong" he said "i suppose i have no further use of you." he waved his hand and pheonix wrong collapsed.

"OJBECTION!" shouted someone

"WHO DARES?!" shotued payne and DEE VASQEZ WAS THERE

"I AM THE VASQUE AND YULL PAY FOR YOUR CRIME!"

"AHHH!"

dee went to punch gaspen in the face but then

CRACK!

her back broke and she died.

"BAHAHAHA!" laughed gaspen kicking her aside. "its time for the rookie humiliator to make his grand return." he waved and he teleported away. just then bokuto came in.

"AGH PHOEIX ARE YU OK?!"

he ran over to phoenixs lying body

"urgh"

"wat wat i cant here you!"

"medicin bokky"

"i... I HAV IT!" bokky gav phoens the medic

"OBJECTIO!" shoutd phoenix "IM FINE LIKE APOLLO!"

"cmon write gets get out of here!" bokky and phoenix escapd the prison wen suddenly the ligtes went red

"DIE PHOENIX WRIGTE AND TRAITOR BOKUTO!" shoute the guards but phoenix through an objection bubble out the window and it dragged him and bokky out too!

"now wat?!"

"TO JAPANIFORNIA!" shouted phoenix

trucy was still on the moon. the gravity stone was keeping her trapped. she had no way to leave the moon. suddenly courtneys gavel landed on the stone smashing it and trucy fell back down to earth unharmed.

"what should i do now" she wondered.

TO BE CONTINUED

AN yay trucys safe dont worry guys that trucy thing was VERY IMPORTANT im not sure how but ill think of somethin dot u worry!


	7. the samurai competition

CHAPTEr 7

the samurai contest

apollo had had enough. he was sick of been treated like rat shit. he turned to juniper and said

"hey bitch im sick of this shit im out of here" and he got up and started banging on the door and junie whispered

"apollo can i leave too" and he said

"no fuck off" but junie said please.

"ugh" apollo moaned "fine. but you owe me more than just please." he kicked the door open and taka flew in

"INTRUDERS" he yelled but apollo slapped him dead. he ran through the hall and burst through the room and saw to his horror samurais. thousands and thousands of samurais.

"get him" yelled the twisted samurai

everyone ganged up o apollo and juniper

"die bitchdonos" shouted the steel samurai and he ran at them but den!

"OBJECTION" shouted apollo and it was SO LOUD that the steel samurais HELMET FLEW OFF!

"AAAGH!" screamed steel and then apollo punched will powsers in the face killing him!

"he wasnt a samura he was an IMPOSTER!" shouted a guy with long black hair and glasses "KILL HIM!"

everyone started beating powers and wile they wer doing that apollo put a bomb at their feets and it BLEW THEM TO BITSES!

he looked up to fight blackquill but saw him with another samurai.

"well then samuraidono... i see you do not wish to fight." blackquill said.

"hah. that wimp. please. you think i could give an ass about two weak looking kids your keeping captive. id rather fight a squirrel like you than your crap." apollo got pissed and yelled at the man blackquill called samuraidono but samuraidono had already started fighting blackquill.

"stop" shouted juniper. "dont kill him mr blackquill" she shouted. samuraidono stepped back.

"not bad blackie. but im not done yet." *whistle* cmon buggy get him and a beetle fell from the ceiling and fell on blackquills face.

"taka" he yelled. but taka was dead. and so was blackquill.

"ha. i win again" samuraidono shouted. he turned to apollo and juniper.

"since you of all people are the finalists i cant pos-" apollo punched him and his teeth flew out and he died and they ran out of the buildi-

"HOLD IT!" professor layton yelled jesus cant you guys let me finish one fucking sent- "i believe there is one contestant left in this samurai contest." GOD DAMMIT! apollo smirked

"come one mr gentleman. what you got huh."

"what have i got" the professor repeated. "HAVE A LOOK!" he yelled and removed a sword from the suit of armor. "theres no lack of swords here justice. choose whichever you wish." he pointed to the sword display. "know this though; only one of them is real. a true warrior always keeps his blade in hand." apollo pointed

"ive got it" he yelled and punched the professor with his hand and knocked him unconscious and took HIS sword and killed layton and thus won the contest and got 40 picarats for solving puzzle 5. but who cares. he didnt. he had to get the hell out. and he ran not realizing he committed thousands and thousands of murders to add to his criminal record.

they ran out into the forest where apollo had passed out earlier. he lay down for a rest as he was exhausted. as he lay down he noticed something in the dirt. a passport belonging to frank sahwit. it said he regularly travelled to the republic of zheng fa. sahwits passport added to the court record.

"come on juniper lets keep going" he muttered. he still had to think of how she was going to pay him.

"polly" she said. he turned and saw her looking to the side. he looked to his right and saw pearls walking on her own.

"pearls" he yelled.

"huff huff" panted phoenix as he and bokuto swam ashore.

"okay huff wat are we gonna do" aid bokuto

suddenly APOLLO RAN PAST THEM! HE DIDNT NOTIC THEM BECAOS HE WAS IN A HURRY!

"apollo"

"who"

"we must give chase bokuto"

"ok"

"court is now in session for the trial of maya fey" said the canadian judge.

"the prosecution is ready your honor" said the blinged up gaspen payne.

"ah we appear to be missing someone. wheres the defense attorney eh" asked canadian judge.

"what do you mean your honor." asked payne. "oh silly me this country relies of defense attorneys. foul things."

"hmph im not sure how i feel about this. i know for a fact that there is one attorney left in this country so where is he." canadian judge pondered. he struck his gavel. "well i believe without a defense this trial cant continue eh. this court finds the defendant maya fey"

"OBJECTION" apollo yelled as he took the defenses bench.

"apollo jester-"

LAUGH LAUGH LAUGH

"i... i mean apollo justice is ready your honor." said apollo

TO BE COTINUED IN THE FINALE!

AN its almost done guys can apollo save maya and maybe find out who the mysterious culprit is FIND OUT TOMORROW!


	8. the day of judgement (final)

CHAPTER 8: the day of judgement

"ah what took you so long eh" canadian judge asked.

"a true samurai never turns his back on a battle" apollo answered.

"aha i see. kids these days. now prosecutor gaspen payne please give your opening statement." gaspen sighed.

"its elementary your honor. maya fey pickpocketed a keychain of ms penny nichols from a boy in zheng fa. the prosecution calls sebastian debeste to testify." sebastian took the stand. "name and occupation" gaspen asked.

"you stole my case" said sebastian.

"that i did. i am the king mr debeste. name and occupation."

"...sebastian debeste. prosecutor."

"good boy. now be a darling and tell us what your investigation turned up."

"i didnt know i was a detective blingy."

"mr debeste please dont make things difficult."

WITNESS TESTIMONY

"in zheng fa an idiot had a keychain pickpocketed. the culprit stowed away on an unknown boat back to japanifornia. she then hid in an unpopulated area the local woods for a little while."

"OBJECTION!" apollo yelled and said "ms juniper woods is a resident of the forest she was found in. thats not even close to unpopulated."

"waaaaaaaaaah sebastian wailed as he hit himself with his baton."

"OBJECTION" yelled the king. "mr justice you are pathetic. ms fey was found far away from the rubble that is ms woods house. you are a stupid little piece of shit and you can shove your attorneys badge up your ass for all i care" said gaspen.

"i agree eh. penalty mr justice." said canadian judge and almost emptied apollos truth bar.

"what" he yelled. "give that back." the canadian judge muttered as he refilled a remarkably tiny part of apollos truth bar. "thank you" apollo said.

"if you guys are done we found the keychain in question in ms feys pocket. also she has no alibi as literally nobody saw her for months. in fact ms pearl fey was actively searching for her."

"(crap this case is solid. there must be a hole here somewhere.)" apollo thought "mr debeste were there any fingerprints found on the keychain."

"ha" debeste laughed. "yes it has the defendants prints."

"is there proof maya was in zheng fa at the time." actually we checked the airport and she took a plane somewhere months ago. aside from myself and courtney nobody has traveled to zheng fa and back recently in airport records."

"OBJECTION!" apollo yelled and he presented sahwits passport.

"frank sahwit. hes traveled to zheng fa a lot."

"where did you find that" sebastian shouted.

"who knows" said apollo. "its a secret."

"you cant keep secrets from the court" sebastian shouted. apollo yelled

"I AM IMMUNE TO THE COURT."

"waaaaaah" sebastian wailed.

"is this true mr justice. are you immune." canadian judge asked.

"yes" said apollo. "oh. no reason for you to have that penalty any more then eh." the canadian judge took back the 98% penalty.

"now then" said canadian judge "lets hear what mr sahwit has to say aboot this." 40 minutes later gaspen payne said

"witness state your name and occupation" and the witness said

"frank sahwit travelling merchant."

"er i am not sure how i feel about this" said canadian judge "didnt my brother declare you guilty of murder some time ago" but sahwit said

"yes but i was released on parole a few months ago because i am a model prisoner" so canadian judge nodded and said

"ah i do know how i fell about that then. now testify please for the court"

WITNESS TESTIMONY

"i dont quite understand why i am here. i am merely a happy travelling merchant"

"HOLD IT who just came out of prison" said apollo jester and everyone laughed.

"penalty mr jester" said canadian judge "oh no hes immune i cant penalize him fuck this."

apollo laughed this time.

"please continue witness" said payne.

"mr jester" said sahwit and everyone laughed again "says i am the pickpocket but that simply isnt true. furthermore there is no record of me travelling to and from zheng fa in the last few days so how could i have gotten the thing and come back" and apollo shouted OBJECTION! and he presented chapter 3 of the fanfiction ace attorneys in the woods

"what is that screamed" sahwit and apollo said "this fanfiction. take that" he yelled as he pointed out the line '"heh heh" laughed the mysterious culprit under them "it seems escaping with the boys shit was cake." he cackled but gummy thought it was courtney and courtney thought it was sebastian and sebastian also thought it was courtney so they paid no attention to it.'

"you there and left by stowing away on boats" and sahwit got mad and threw his toupee at apollo and everyone laughed even though i didnt say his last name.

"shut up shut up shut up" sahwit yelled "i hate you. go burn you flea."

"hey now" said canadian judge

"you cant do that to the immune apollo jester" and everyone laughed. "im not sure how i feel about that."

apollo slammed the desk

"its over frankie"

"ha. tough words. fite me reel m8." sahwit laughed.

"well apollo it seems this evidence isnt enough" said canadian judge and apollo said

"whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat" but candian judge shook his head and said

"the person in the fic is named mysterious culprit and we dont know who this mr culprit is."

"wait your honor im not done" said apollo and then he yelled "take that" and presented chapter 5 of ace attorneys in the woods and frank screamed again and he made his toupee appear again so he could throw it at apollo again so everyone could laugh again.

"it says here that dick gumshoe purchased this keychain..." and he slammed his desk in rage and pointed and the camera zoomed in on him and he yelled "by you frank sahwit!" and sahwit screamed again and threw another toupee at him.

"but mr jester gumshoe isnt maya fey" said payne but apollo laughed and yelled

"take that" as he presented chapter 1 and this time gaspen payne screamed and started sweating

"no you cant" he stammered.

"i can" said apollo. "look here." ' gaspen winced in payne and slapped him until he died.' and everyone laughed at the pun. apollo slammed his desk and pointed to the next line 'maya said im here to channel gummys spirit and she got on the bed and channeled gummy'

"mr gaspen payne you murdered dick gumshoe" shouted canadian judge and gaspen said

"i did im sorry canadian judge" said gaspen and canadian judge said

"well if your sorry i suppose its alright" said canadian judge.

"in the first chapter gumshoe was murdered and maya channeled him and he stayed in her. gumshoe searched the forest for mr edgeworth and kay and ran into frank sahwit who gave him the keychain. pearls then found gumshoe in chapter 6" said apollo presenting chapter 6 "and gumshoe left mayas body. what do you have to say about that mr sahwit." sahwit laughed.

"you think you could get me with that silly fanfiction" he laughed and apollo screamed

"oh shiiiiiit."

"sorry boy but this isnt some dumb story."

"OBJECTION!" came a voice and EDGEWORTH RUSHED IN

"edgy what is it" said apollo

"i have disturbing news this IS a fanfiction!"

"WHAAAAAT?" screamed sahwit

"GOTCHA SAWIT!" shouted apollo

"no you havent!" shouted sahwit "you havent explained how i got to zheng fa to steal the keychain." apollo screamed again. "im outta here" but then someone yelled

"hold it" and trucy ran to the stand.

"polly. i have information" and apollo said

"yay."

"remember in chapter 1 when i was "kidnapped by the moon" fran sahwit was there when i woke up."

apollo sweated.

"and then he jumped down leaving me there."

"trucy..." said apollo "...when was this."

"must have been on march 21. it was almost 1PM right" she said and apollo kept sweating.

"but" canadian judge said looking at the court records "thats when the pickpocketing happened."

"you cant be serious said apollo but trucy was certain.

"no. maybe it was 4PM" he suggested but trucy said no.

"(damn. damn! sahwit has an alibi. shit.)" apollo thought. "(right at the time of the pickpocketing sahwit was with trucy. so how the hell could he have done it.)"

but apollo realized it wwas hopeless. he turned to canadian judge ad took off his badge "this is for you. i no longer have the right to be a lawyer."

however before he could finish THE DOORS FLUNG OPEN!

phoenix was standing there looking badass well he WOULD have if ther wasnt a stupid looking kid next to him

"bokkys not stupid" said phoenix

"PHOENIX WRITE YOUR ALIVE?!" shouted EVRYBODY in the cortroom

"I THOGHT I KILLED YOU!" shouted payn in piano

"dam right evryone and im here to PUT A LID ON THIS CASE FOR GOOD!"

"but how its hopeless mr sawit has an alibi" said apollo

phoenix ran to the defece bench. suddenly bokuto appered there. oh wait he ran there hes just so small so i didnt notice.

"not quite apollo so mr sawit you were on the moon" said phoenix confident

"yeah"

"well now your fucked" he said. he pointed and yelled "thats how you got to zheng fa." and sahwit shouted

"what" shouted apollo and phoenix smirked.

"you jumped off the moon to get there. that way you wouldnt need a boat" he shouted and then sahwit cried and cried and cried and cried and cried and fell on the floor dead.

"aw yeh bitch turnabouts 4 life" said phoenix

"well that brings an end to court proceedings. but im sorry but i cant declare ms fey not guilty" said canadian judge and everyone screamed. "im sorry but the evidence was not realistic and we lost our witness"

"nooooooooooooooo you suck i want udgey back." screamed apollo

"this court finds the defendant maya fey"

"OBJECTION" someone yelled and canadian judge said "cant you assholes let me hand down my verdict eh."

phoenix looked to the witness stand and saw luke.

"your honor i dont think you should do that. ms maya is innocent. so i have decided to come here..." he said and everyone went quiet...

"to give you this in exchange for her innocence" he said presenting a sack.

canadian judges eyes widened and asked what was in the bag and luke opened it revealing lots and lots of gold.

"because friends are more important than gold" said luke this is a life lesson guys remember this.

"ehhhhhh FINE" said the judge accepting the gold. "oh well. i guess this court actually finds the defendant maya fey NOT GUILTY. that is all. court is adjourned."

"yaaaaaaaaaay luke your the best" said maya in the defendants lobby and luke said "thanks."

"hey i heard the canadian judge lost all his friends and his brother for taking the gold" said apollo

"lol he got ripped off" said phoenix

"i think we should have a party in honor of lukes efforts" said maya

"why not me since i was the defense attorney" asked apollo

"and what about me since i found the damn contradiction" asked phoenix

"and what about me who saved mr wright" said bokuto

"oh right you guys can pay"

the three of them glared at her and they all pointed at her at the same time and shouted

"OBJECTION!"

Epilogue

"sniff" sebastian sniffed.

"what is wrong" said courtney.

"payne stole my case" said sebastian.

"awww sebastian... are you okay" she asked.

"yeah" said sebastian "pearl gave me a puzzle to make me feel better."

"can i try it" said courtney.

"sure" said sebastian.

PUZZLE NO. 4

Who to worship?

This puzzle is worth a thousand words, which are worth 70 picarats.

Who should you worship? God, Money, Apollo or Wario?

"OVERRULED" yelled courtney taking out her new gavel. "the goddess of the law is not in here so there is no answer."

"...lissen bitch." said a mans voice

"huh" said courtney.

"you know what i think of that."

"huh."

"ill tell you what i think of that..."

and then a man who sounded like a spanish manfred von karma yelled

"PROTESTO!"

END


End file.
